a journey toward non-traditional wedded bliss, with style

Writing Your Own Ceremony August 14, 2009

Over a year ago, I wrote a post outlining my goals for writing our ceremony. Since I love to write and I wanted to make our ceremony as personalized as possible, this was my favorite “project” even though at times it was overwhelming. There was just so much I wanted to express in under 20 minutes. Even though there were still sentences I might have tweaked, Drew and I were both really happy with the result and I thought I would our process with you if you’re also planning to write your own ceremony. So let’s revisit my original goals:

1) Alternative Wedding Blessing – We did end up going with the Apache Wedding Blessing which has a spiritual as opposed to religious message.

2) Interesting Readings – Drew and I both searched until we found something that we found meaningful. I ended up with a passage from The Little Prince, one of my favorite stories, and Drew chose an Ayn Rand reading. If you’re also considering unusual readings you can check out Offbeat Bride, Credit Crunch Bride, or this article for some great ideas. I also checked out from this book from the library which had endless ideas organized with an easy to use index.

3) Personal Vows – After several long discussions, we decided to keep our vows very simple. A lot of couples chose to write their own vows to each other, but we liked the idea of making each other promises we had decided on together. I have a whole post planned on how to write vows so stay tuned!

4) Thank Yous – We also kept this very simple, by trying to express how much we appreciated everyone’s love and support at the beginning of the ceremony. The sentiment here was inspired by the script of a handfasting ceremony.

“Bride and Groom have asked you to be here today because each of you has made a unique and lasting impression on their lives. They know that making the journey took considerable effort for many of you and for this they are grateful. Your support, your friendship, and your love helped to make Bride and Groom who they needed to be to find first themselves – and then each other.”

5) Length – I never got an official statement about what our ceremony clocked in at, but I’m pretty sure it was about twenty minutes. We were ready to party!

If you’d like me to send you a full script of our ceremony (I had some friends who did this for us and it was very helpful when I was brainstorming) just comment below!


48 Responses to “Writing Your Own Ceremony”

  1. Alicyn Says:

    I would love a copy of the full script, especially which Ayn Rand quote you used. My fiancee is a big fan and we will definitely be using something from her in our ceremony.
    Thanks for the great site!

  2. Ty Says:

    I would love a copy as well. Thank you so much!

  3. Jess Says:

    We are currently in the process of writing our ceremony and I have no idea where to start! I would love a copy for some much-needed inspiration, thank you!

  4. Nikki Says:

    We’re coming up with a script for my fiance’s cousin who will be marrying us. If you could send a copy of your script for ideas I would totally appreciate it.

  5. Lisa Says:

    Hi! I would really love a copy, also. My wedding is two months out and we haven’t even started on this. AHHH! Any additional tips or other ceremony ideas you have are greatly appreciated! I’m so thankful for blogs like yours

  6. Bridal Girl Says:

    It’s hard for me……..writing my own ceremony…..ah
    Your posting helps me to make the guidance.
    Thanks for sharing…

  7. Carol Says:

    I’d love a copy too! I’m finding it so hard to put this ceremony together…and the wedding’s only 3 weeks away.

  8. KLL Says:

    I would love a copy too! I am currently putting my ceremony together for my Sept 20th wedding! Thanks you so much for sharing with us!

  9. Hi,

    Your ceremony sounds so special, intimate, and meaningful and I would definitely love if you could email me a script of your ceremony! My fiance and I are getting married March 20th and are really having a rough time right now planning the details and logistics of our actually ceremony and yours sounds great! Thanks so much, hope to hear from you soon!



  10. Irene Says:

    I’m so anxious about writing our ceremony. It’s the most important part of the wedding, after all. And being so anxious and intimidated by it, I keep procrastinating on it. I would be so grateful to get a copy of yours, it sounds lovely.

  11. Kate Says:

    I’d really appreciate a copy, too. We’re thinking along the same lines for our ceremony.

  12. Sara Leigh Says:

    Would you please share a copy of the ceremony with us? We are just beginning to write ours and it would be so helpful to see what you had written. Thank you

  13. Elissa Says:

    Such wonderful advice… we’re doing the same thing. I have 6 weeks to go and am now starting to bite my nails a bit.

  14. It’s always a great idea to create a unique wedding and write your own. Great information here. Thanks for sharing!

  15. Lissa Says:

    I’d love a copy of the full script— stressing out about vows. Getting married in 3 weeks.

  16. Katie Says:

    I would love a copy of your script! Great ideas to get going on the brainstorming process!

  17. Chandra Says:

    I would love to have a copy of your script; it would be helpful in the ceremony planning. Thanks!

  18. wedding17 Says:

    Hey here i got very nice information with pics. I am going to use this ideas to plan my wedding.

  19. Colleen Says:

    A copy would be great! Thanks for sharing!

  20. Anna Says:

    I would like a copy as well. I am trying to get a feel for as many different ceremonies as I can. This will help a lot when writing mine!

  21. Ashley Says:

    Hello! I would love a full script of your ceremony if possible!! Thanks!! 🙂

  22. Jaime Says:

    I would love a copy!!!

  23. Jackie Says:

    Please send me a copy! I love what I’ve ready so far! 🙂

  24. Shellie Says:

    Would love a copy of the script. I am planning mine now, and am trying to get as many ideas as possible.

    Thanks! Your blog is great!

  25. Amy Says:

    Great tips – especially the one about length. The best thing about writing your own ceremony is that you control the length and only include the stuff that you want in there. My outdoor wedding took about 15 minutes. It was beautiful and my toddler was able to sit through the entire thing!

  26. Amanda Says:

    I’d love a copy if you could send it! I’m 68 days out and putting the finishing touches on my ceremony.

  27. I would love to see a copy of your ceremony if you don’t mind… Please email it to me when you have a chance… Thank you!

  28. Paula-Sherrie & Davan Says:

    This would mean alot. its been such a challenge trying to write our ceremony ourselves. we arer very spiritual people but not religious at all but we have very religious families. we want the ceremony to touch them in a way that they never thought it would and make them leave in tears thinking how beautiful it was and really giving them a sense of the true depth of our love and bond dispite the fact that we arent getting married in a church the traditional way they want us to. help me pleaaase. i would be soooo exceptionally greatful!! Thanks a billion!!! xoxoxox

  29. Johanna Says:

    I would like to see a copy please. I feel so lost trying to create our own ceremony. I love the Indian blessing! thanks so much

  30. Jennie Hepler Says:

    I’d love to see a copy of your ceremony. I am writing ours and I’d love some inspiration. Thank you so much!

  31. Christina Says:

    I just stumbled across this blog. Can you please send me a copy too! Thanks so much. Our wedding is less than 2 months away 🙂

  32. Hänni Says:


    Just reading this today. I am struggling to figure out an order to my upcoming ceremony. Can you email me a copy of your script?

  33. Jim Says:

    Hi. I’ve been given the task to figure out the format of our ceremony. I really enjoyed your ideas and would love to review your script as a reference. Thanks again for all your great ideas.


  34. Jamie London Says:

    I’m really impressed with all the careful thought and consideration that went into planning the wedding. Writing is time-consuming and fulfilling, when everything comes into play. Really great job!

    I would like to suggest that brides and grooms, or fathers of the bride, or the best man can add some special quotes or sayings to their wedding speeches, to make the event even more meaningful and memorable!

    Thanks for sharing!

  35. Joni Narimatsu Says:

    I have stumbled upon your website and I am totally hooked. I am a poor medical student, so me and my fiance are trying to do everything on our own. Your website thus far has been a great inspiration, and I was hoping to review a copy of your full script as well, since we are both clueless to say the least. Thank you!

  36. Mihai Rosu Says:

    Hi there.
    About this post, it’s really nice.Thanks for posting it.Those informations will be helphul when i’ll get married.

  37. Shannon Says:

    would love a copy as I am pulling my hair out on trying to figure mine all out. Thanks so much!!

  38. Admy Moore Says:

    something chic to include in your bridal emergency kit! I used this at my wedding, just thought you might like it! It’s called ‘after flats’ very elegant! you can wear it after your feet start to hurt from wearing heels. affordable! 🙂

    their website is i think us…

  39. shauna Says:

    Can you please send me a copy? Thank you!

  40. Rosemary Says:

    Hi I would be grateful for a copy of the ceremony as I would like to publish it on my website for my readers to see. Many thanks!

  41. I did my own…my husband and I wrote our personal vows… for us it was more sincere that way 🙂

  42. Petter Says:

    I would love to have a copy of the Ayn Rand reading. Best regards, Petter from Norway.

  43. Robin Says:

    Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though you relied on the video to make your point.
    You obviously know what youre talking about, why throw away your intelligence on
    just posting videos to your weblog when you
    could be giving us something informative to read?

  44. Kimberly Says:

    You actually make it seem really easy together with your presentation but I find this topic to
    be actually one thing that I think I would by no means understand.
    It kind of feels too complicated and extremely extensive for me.
    I’m taking a look forward in your next submit, I will try to get the cling of it!

  45. I think what you said made a bunch of sense.
    But, what about this? what if you were to create a awesome post title?
    I mean, I don’t want to tell you how to run your website, however suppose you added a post title that makes people desire more? I mean Writing Your Own Ceremony | BridalCheek is a little plain. You might peek at Yahoo’s front page
    and watch how they create post titles to grab viewers to click.
    You might add a video or a picture or two
    to grab readers interested about what you’ve written. In my opinion, it might make your posts a little livelier.

  46. katie Says:

    Hi, I would love a copy of your ceremony! Thank you for sharing your process!

  47. Lisa Strong Says:

    I would love a copy….its been 34 years since I did this and this go around I want ‘more’.
    Thank you,

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